Constant reminders

When starting any new habit, one needs to be prepared to be psychologically challenged. Otherwise it wouldn't be a new habit would it? If you've been following along in my blog posts, you would know that I have been working on being more compassionate towards myself since I am out there learning new things. Here are a few examples of how I've combatted a few difficult moments.

1.) Navigating a gluten free meal in the Las Vegas airport. We thought we would have time to get dinner on the strip before our flight in Las Vegas. But that didn't happen because of traffic. It had already been a hard day, saying bye to my family, having a haywire schedule, and now, not having something planned. I was emotional and all over the place- feeling a bit too much. But with Jacob being patient with me and assuring me I wasn't being too much, and reminding me he was happy to have a healthier me, I decided the Mexican place near our terminal was the best move. I know this might seem like a lot since all I had to do was state what I would rather eat. But I took a deep breathe, placed my hand on my stomach, went into my inner knowing to decide what I wanted, and said it. It's a reminder that your inner knowing, even on easier decisions, is always there. Sometimes you just have to go on a deeper mission to find it.

2.) Accidentally ordering a glutenous sandwich. Having got back into town and not getting groceries. I ordered a tuna 'unwich' from Jimmy John's, thinking it would be gluten free. Well, upon looking into the ingredients after ordering it, it appears the tuna somehow has gluten in it. I was crushed. One, because if I was going to eat a glutenous meal, I wouldn't have ordered that, I would've gotten pad thai or something. Two, because I wasn't diligent enough to check. But then I ate the sandwich and remembered that I have a lot of time to figure out this lifestyle. And one time out of the whole month of giving it my all was pretty good odds. Compassion and inner forgiveness is required when trying anything new, I reminded myself.

3.) Preparing for a detox. In the book Woman Code, she lays out a four day detox that I wanted to try in between my Utah and San Diego trip. It requires detox juices, flaxseed, lots of fruits and veggies, beans, and salmon. I was excited to do it to see what happens to my body (yes there will be a blog post on that). But as we were getting everything I needed, which involved going to an all organics store, I started to feel like too much again because I decided it was a pricey new endeavor (even though it wasn't). I am a lot like my dad in this sense, worrying about money unwarrantedly. This was definitely one of those times. But Jacob, short but sweetly looked at our bank account and brought me back down to earth and said we have nothing to worry about. Plus he just started a new job that'll bring in more money, so yeah, he's got a point. I had to remind myself not to be so existential and that not everything was so final. Now I can happily do the detox in a few days.

So while I'm not happy that these moments happened, I am happy with how I handled them. Not perfectly, but organically. I am better able to remind myself of my new mind patterns/habits, than before. And that's all a girl can hope for.

Constantly yours,

Emma